Thursday, July 25, 2013

Grimmbreak Reviews: Welcome fellow fans

 The more gore the better, welcome to the amazing and confusing world of the B-movies horror flicks.

Let me be your host, as we travel through the tons of gore, cheapest practical effects and the worse acting mankind has to offer. It’s time to leave your dignity behind and laugh when zombies start dancing in the rain to an overrated song and crazy fish people look to sacrifice some random hot blond to an ancient deity, all while we fight the cheap scares and the random distraction boobs thrown on the screen in hope we won’t see the cable holding that possessed demonic girl. See, told you it’ll get weird, don’t say I didn’t warn ya. Feel free to check the reviews, both the written ones and the videos by yours truly.Be sure to check out “ ” for more B-horror randomness

Now, I’m sure you’re all confused and scared as you came to this awesome blog, but fear not! Ok, maybe just a little. But I shall relieve you from you’re confusion by answering the question that keeps you awake at night: 

What is them rei-viuu them crazy folks be talking bout? 

Glad you asked, random stereotype voice only I seem able to hear. A review is an analysis of a certain piece, where the best and the worse are being brought to light for a better understanding of the media. Of course, it doesn’t hurt to bash something as much as possible for the maximum amount of fun. 

What is a B movie? 

Movies that don’t make it to the A list for their often poor quality or bad/disturbing/immoral premise. Those often don’t get a lot of financial support and are shot in the cheapest of ways, and the producers round up a cast of friends or whatever they could scrape from the bottom of the barrel to act in their projects. There are obviously some exceptions, like for example some movie that sounded good on paper, and did get a lot of financial aid, but the director or actors, or someone out there f8cked up royally, and the movie remains as a bad memory or as a guilty pleasure in most of our memory. Oh, and we’ll also review hilariously horrible exploitation movies and some grindhouse. 

Now I know what you’re all asking, and no, you’re not dreaming, this amazing and awesome blog really exist to save you from the melancholy and boredom of the everyday life, but what you also should have asked is: why would anyone want to watch these kind of movies and why bother reviewing it? Well, that’s simple. These movies are beyond awesome, there is a charm to practical effects and there is just so much to love with these movies. Sure, they ain’t perfect, but that’s what makes them so great. Most of the movies are what you can call a “cult movie”, which means that a small, but determined fandom exist for it. And even though lately these fandom have expanded immensely with the growing popularity of b-horror movies, I still feel these masterpieces don’t really get the attention they deserve. 

The f*ck r u?? 

Good question my illiterate friend, good question indeed. Who am I? why I am just you’re friendly neighborhood critic. I am the pen in the night, the voice in the protest against bad remakes and random nudity that doesn’t add anything to the movie but only decrease its value. I am Grimmbreak.
Or…at least I would be if I wasn’t some guy sitting behind his computer b*tching about movies. But hey, perspectives, right?But all kidding aside, I’m a movie lover, especially B-horror. I’m also a gamer and a geek who calls himself an critic, although all my experience comes from watching movies, I didn’t spend years studying cinematography and criticism or anything, I’m just a guy with a hobby, and I’m proud of it, who needs smart people anyway?

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